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March 2010
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May 2010

A little help?

Last fall the hubby and I had ourselves a little painting frenzy, in hopes of putting our house on the market and maybe actually getting what we owe out of it.  Well, that dream died (surprise, surprise), so our Plan B involved staying in this house for another 5 - 7 years, then trying to sell.  Since that's the case, we told darling daughter that we would repaint her room in some color other than taupe.  (She has been deeply scarred by the whole experience of sleeping in a room with brown walls.)  Faith is very artistic and creative, and she already has a plan for her room.  It's going to look great, I know.

My room, on the other hand....well.   I have no idea.  Our walls are a medium linen color, so just about anything goes there, but the carpet - ugh.  It's an odd blue with bits of nasty pink, and we can't really afford to replace it right now, so I have to find some way to work with it.  Anybody have any ideas for me?  I'm thinking of going with midnight blue and aqua as my accent colors, since I have drapes in the blue and the master bath is pale aqua.  I'd love some suggestions for this.  That carpet just has me stymied.  Usually I can work around stuff, but this one's got me.  Ideas? 

Where was I? (A little bit of random) (Okay, a big bit of random)

I gotta tell ya, this year is FLYING by.  FLYING, I say!  How is it possible that it's almost May already?   I could swear it's still early March.  Very strange. 

The last few weeks have been pretty much consumed by The Nose.  Everything has revolved around The Nose....does it hurt, is it stuffy, can I breathe through it properly, can I put makeup on it yet without yelping, blah blah blah.  The Nose has ruled my life.  I am ready to be done with The Nose.  Really, done.  Thankfully it's improving, but wow, what a long-drawn-out process this has been.  Next time I have surgery I'm going straight for the tummy tuck, you know?  Let vanity rule for once. 

Eldest son has been driving himself anywhere he can, every chance he gets.  The luster of a new driver's license has transformed his world.  His siblings even ride with him without (obvious) fear and trembling.  I still fear and tremble, but that's because I'm the Mom and it's my job.  Drives him crazy, poor kid. 

Frodo is still my daily dose of laughter.  That silly puppy cracks me up.  The kids brought him home a squeaky toy yesterday shaped like a pig, with a squeaker that actually sounds like a pig's oinking.  He loves it.  At first he was a little scared of it - he'd dash up to it, nudge it with his nose and then run like crazy.   Now he drags it all over the house, oinking like a pro.   I was on the phone with my sister last night and she could hear him in the background...."oink...oink oink oink....OINK!" 

I am beginning to realize that as much as I love to knit, I don't love it enough to finish stuff.  Isn't that pathetic?   A few scarves, a sock here or there, some mitts - but that's about it.  I just don't have the gumption for the big projects, apparently.  It makes me sad - there are SO many gorgeous sweater patterns out there that I'd love to try - but the reality is, I'd buy the yarn and it would either sit there or I'd begin the sweater, get halfway and THEN it would sit there.  It's just a shame, you know?  Maybe I just need a swift kick in the seat of the pants.  Or more caffeine.  Yeah, that's it. 

Well, I have (for the moment) exhausted my readily-accessible store of random comments, so I suppose I should go get something done here in this disaster zone I call home.  Another cup of coffee and away we go!

The first one

My oldest child got his driver's license today. 

I don't like it much. 

Oh, I know it will be handy to have another driver around.  And yes, he's going to be 18 this summer, so it's time.  He's a good, sensible, responsible kid, and I have no concerns about him running off to wild parties or picking up strange women or whatever.  It's just....he's the first one.  My  first one.  It's a little weirder than I expected.

I've always joked that when my last kid turns 18, we're changing all the locks.  I love my children dearly, but I have never seen myself as being defined solely by motherhood.  It's a lifetime job, for sure, and (at times) a very consuming one, but it's not all there is to my life.  In fact, I look forward to having time to pursue my interests without stopping to make lunch, or run someone to the dentist, or referee another sibling "discussion".   So I'm a bit perplexed by just how odd it feels to have Luke taking this first big step towards leaving the nest.   What's up?

   Oh, I know what's up.  Change is what's up, and change - even normal, healthy, good-for-you change - rarely takes place smoothly.  While the kids are learning to be adults, I'm learning to let them be adults, and that means looking at them (and myself) in very different ways.  I can't just look at them anymore and think "Aw, they played really well together today!"   More and more I find myself having discussions with them about things like a friend's poor relationship choices, or whether they really feel they could be passionate about ____ as a career, or what the latest political brouhaha means to us here in the midwest.   And I look at myself and wonder "Did I teach them how to stick with it when things get tough?  Have we given them the skills to be successful adults?"  On and on and on....dozens, hundreds of questions, and the only way they'll be answered is by letting my little birds fly and seeing how they land. 

When your kids are little, you worry about things like ear infections, and are they getting enough green veggies, and will that child EVER be potty-trained?  Then they get a little older, and it's stuff like learning their multiplication tables and how to ride a bike.  Middle school comes along, and all of a sudden you're dealing with hormones and mean kids and why can't I have clothes just like so-and-so?  Each stage gets harder, for the  child and the parent....and even though you know that intellectually, dealing with it emotionally is something else altogether.   So I know this isn't the end, by a long shot.  We still have high school graduations and college choices and first romances and all that other stuff to deal with up ahead. 


Yep, lots of changes coming, for all of us.  But Luke and Seth just walked in from Luke's first solo trip to the store, laughing together like a pair of hyenas, and somehow I'm reassured that these changes can be faced with a smile. 

One week down

Well, it has been one week since my sinus surgery, and I have to say that this experience was not at all what I anticipated.   There's been a lot more pain than I expected, as well as some rather strange side effects.  I have learned a few things, though.

Thing the first:  Vicodin and I do not get along.  Not at all.  In fact, after waking up enough to take the stupid evil pill and then promptly throwing it up twice in a row, I refused to even mess with it.   If it's not going to stay down, it's not going to help with the pain, so what's the point?  Instead, I took acetominophen and moaned a lot.  I'm not sure my family appreciated it, but let me tell you, being sick to your stomach after sinus surgery is NOT fun. 

Thing the second:  just because a surgery is performed on an outpatient basis doesn't mean it's going to be "no big deal".  Yeah, I was dumb.  I actually thought I'd only be in serious pain for a day or two.  Instead, it it took me a day or two to shake the anaesthetic enough to realize just how much I hurt.  I was soooooo out of it, I couldn't even stay awake enough to eat.   If you've ever been hit square in the nose with a softball (or ball bat, or basketball, know....) just imagine that first moment of knee-buckling pain.  Now imagine that it doesn't go away.  For days.  I was not prepared at all for the severity of the pain.  It could be that I'm just a huge wimp with the pain tolerance of a cheese puff, but I'm sticking with the "worse than I expected" theory. 

Thing the third:  if you have sizable pieces of plastic up your nose, you WILL notice.  I don't care what anyone tells you, that is not something you can ignore.  In addition, having said pieces of plastic up your nose can affect other things, like how your tear ducts drain.  In my case, my left eye didn't drain at all as it's supposed to;  instead, the tear duct backed up and gunked up my eye.  Thoroughly.  It was like pink eye, without the pinkness and itching but with extra gunk.   After a couple days that went away, but now I find that I occasionally wake up with a little "pouch" under my left eye.  Nice, huh?  I was very thrilled to get the splints out on Friday - grossed out, but thrilled.  Funny how much better that made me feel.

So here I am, still somewhat swollen and sore, but coming along.  Hopefully in a couple more weeks things will be settled and I'll have some idea if the surgery accomplished what I'd hoped, which is a reduction in the number and severity of my headaches.  Until then - well, at least I can't smell the farmer down the road spreading manure!  Always a bright side, eh?


Having tried several times this week to come up with something coherent to post, and having failed miserably every time, I finally gave up.  I decided that I'd wait for Easter, when I wouldn't have to be particularly brilliant or funny or even coherent, because it's all been said before, and said well.   "He is not here, for He has risen just as He said."   The job is finished.   Hallelujah!